Monday, August 31, 2009

Changing Focus

"All my life I had been looking for something, and everywhere I turned, someone tried to tell me what it was. I accepted their answers too, though they were often in contradiction and even self-contradictory. I was naïve. I was looking for myself and asking everyone except myself questions which I, and only I, could answer. It took me a long time and much painful boomeranging of my expectations to achieve a realization everyone else appears to have been born with: that I am nobody but myself." ~ Ralph Ellison

Like Mr. Ellison, I too was late coming to this realization. But thank God I did!!!
It seems as if most of what I hear and stumble upon reading these days is something along these lines or it points to the profound impact our experiences of just who we are, can have on others around us.  Yes, no matter what others say, no matter what others believe about us, it is our own lives that speak the loudest truth.  Our living authentically is our best defense.

I want to spend some more time speaking these truths.  I am not talking about the film clips of the families together or years long relationships.  Though those have their place.  I am talking about our own knowledge that we are gay.  Not confused, not questioning, but simply gay.  No book, no opinion, no faked out, trumped up studies can change the truth of our own lives and inner knowledge of this. 

Also, I have decided not to continue with the original track of Blogging for Truth because what the Anti Gay Industry says about us is not valid, but what we have to say about who we are is.  And it is more powerful than their biggest lies.

All religions tell us to think on those things that are good and pure and wise.  Hundreds of self help gurus promise riches and happiness if you just imagine the things you want.  While some of them go a bit far with the imagining, there is, I believe a universal truth at work in all of these beliefs.  If we focus our attention on attaining that we expect, then we act in ways that will achieve the things we expect. While bad things happen to everyone in life, studies do show optimists tend to have good things happen to them more often than not, and pessimists more frequently have negative things happen.  We tend to get what we expect, not always what we want.

With that, and because things are still rolling around in the ole brain, I will leave you with one last quote to arm yourself with when the nay sayers are harping at or even in your head:

"Rabbi Zusya said that on the Day of Judgment, God would ask him, not why he had not been Moses, but why he had not been Zusya." ~Walter Kaufmann 

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